Love Is Not…

I sincerely thought majority of the world was on the same page in relation to domestic violence. I thought we could hand pick the nations that would openly defend it.

I thought and I was clearly wrong.

How terrible it is when we generalise and assume without careful thought consideration and facts.

Staying true to my recent addiction to YouTube videos, I was watching random videos – from some beloved vlogs to Ellen (:D) when I stumbled upon a Pulse TV video with a rather interesting topic.

Now, this is not to say I don’t watch pulse. I find some of their Street Strivia very interesting and can we help but love Chuey Chu? I swear, I can never get how he is able to keep a straight face!

Back to the main point. What was the name of this video?

Is it okay for a man to hit a woman? Or something like that.

To say this video left me stupefied is a grand understatement. In the video, I found men (grown men) justifying domestic violence.

Back track. These are normal everyday people. Lay people. Ordinary human beings. And they somehow found hitting women a necessary evil.

Oh, they mostly agreed that it is wrong but they also agreed that it might become necessary on occasion. One man without any visible remorse explained how he gave his wife a good beating because she disobeyed him. Thankfully, when asked, he said he won’t be doing it again.

My point however is how the act can be justified. Many of them said things like, “the man might not want to but might have to in response to the woman’s behaviour or character.”

Tell me, if a blind man leads another blind man, where will they end up?

I won’t even bother to go into the comments of some of the women who were interviewed. It simply breaks my heart and I happen to like it whole.

I find it strange and even funny in a strange way that people can be against and for a thing, all at the same time. I figure Jesus was spot on when he reiterated that people should not lukewarm. They should either be hot or cold. He knows His creations so well. We’re not for or against. We’re not here or there.

How confused are we?

It’s important to speak up for what we believe, what we truly believe. It might seem unnecessary but your voice might be the push someone else needs. Your voice might help carry someone else’s voice. We can’t condemn and then justify.

So I’ll say it (and if you could see me, you’ll see me typing this with my head held high). Hitting your spouse is beyond justification. Hitting another human being is very possible and happens often. However, when you claim to love someone: you will work at containing that temper so you don’t hurt that person; you will take the hurtful words of the moment because you know two wrongs can never make a right.

It takes incredible strength to stand completely on one side of the divide. How strong are you?

Love is patient and kind;

Love is not jealous or conceited or proud; 

Love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable;

Love does not keep a record of wrongs; 

Love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth.

Love never gives up;

and its faith, hope, and patience never fail.

Photo from



©Oreoluwa Matemilola 2017
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Oreoluwa Matemilola and with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.


2 thoughts on “Love Is Not…

  1. I recently watched a similar interview from Morocco (I think) where women justified and in fact encouraged men beating their wives. It is supposedly a sign of affection. Well done for being one the voices of reason, great post.

    Liked by 1 person

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