Actions, Reactions, Realisations 🥺

Dear blog,
Someone asked me about you recently

I guess I was overwhelmed about the attention

I probably got scared at the possibility of expectation

I grew scared at the scrutiny and analysis I imagined would follow

And so, I did something I shouldn’t have
———-

Someone asked about you recently

And with a chuckle of dismissal

I waved a hand and shrugged

As the words of betrayal flowed from my lips

‘It’s nothing serious,’ I said, ‘nothing professional. Just something I do for fun.’ ————

Someone asked about you recently

And since then, I’ve been evaluating my reactions

Why did I feel the need to shrink what you are

Did diminishing what you’ve become and mean make me feel better?

What exactly does my reaction tell about me?

———-

Someone asked about you recently

Faster than a bolt of lightning, fear swept in

I could blame fear forever, but I won’t

I am responsible for my actions and reactions

And I’m glad… so glad that I can see that something’s wrong.

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Published by Julzore